Perception of Confidence?

I'm a 25 year old guy, who's never been successful in getting a girlfriend. I'm somewhat attractive, in good shape, very intelligent, a little on the geeky side, spiritual, basically everything a girl can want.



I do have a major problem though that I can't seem to overcome. For the longest time, I thought it was my confidence. I'm unable to approach women, and when I'm going out with girls, I'm unable to take the next steps in holding hands, kissing etc, which makes the girls do all the work and lose interest.



Lately though I've realized that I am a pretty confident person. I know what I'm doing most of the time, and have no problem doing it. I'm a natural leader in many situations, and people are happy to follow.



The problem is that I was brought up with a very strict understanding of rules when interacting people. I feel like I'm committing a crime when I'm talking to someone without being addressed or when the social situation around me doesn't require that I speak to a person. This of course makes it difficult for me to interact with people in certain situations, most notably, approaching a girl who is a stranger to ask her out. I tend to view myself as a gentleman, and my natural way of approaching women is to help them when they appear to be in need, but in this age where chivalry is considered a crime, is there any place for a person like me?



Has anyone else experienced this and found a way around it? I do find I don't struggle with these ';permission'; issues when trying the online dating, yet I have so much more success with women in real life, when I do occasionally break my rules to ask a waitress or cashier out. Does this even make any sense at all?



I don't think my self-perception of being a gentleman will ever change, however I do feel like I don't belong, and am struggling to figure out how I fit in to today's society.Perception of Confidence?
You need to figure out how to be true to yourself and do what makes you happy. Don't worry about ';fitting into today's society.'; There are plenty of women who would love to date someone like you, so focus on finding someone who has similar beliers. When you do start up a conversation with a girl (or if she initiates the conversation, whichever way it goes), be honest and up front about your feelings on social interaction. There are plenty of women out there who don't mind taking the initiative in the romantic area, especially if you are as masculine, confident, and assertive as you claim to be in other areas. The biggest problem I think people face is not being clear about their intentions and expectations. If you are up front to begin with, you might go through a gazillion dates but when you do find the woman of your dreams, you'll be the man of her dreams and it will be a perfect match.Perception of Confidence?
just do it!
i hate it when guys say ';i'm everything a woman could ever want!'; and then cry about how they can't get a girlfriend. quite possibly could it be that you are NOT everything a woman could ever want?



you sound like you just need to get over yourself.
eh it could be tht u have yet found the rie girl

but im a lot like you except i am 10 years younger %26amp; a girl but the thing is you jjust gota step out of the comfort zone sometimes to get what you want
How about going to a renaissance festival? You can be a total gentleman there and not be out of place at all. Are you getting out and doing activities that might also be attended by eligible ladies? Sometimes it's easier to meet women when you're in a group and you are all there for a particular interest. That way you already have something in common, and therefore, something to talk about. I think you're limiting yourself too much. If you don't speak up, you better not expect the lady to. Are you old school or not? Speak up or lose out.