I'm very socially awkward... people just don't like me, and i don't know how to conduct myself around them. ?

i just don't know what to do. it's hard for me to talk to people my own age. it's almost painful. i don't want to be a lonely loser, but that's basically what i am. i need to learn how to interact with people the right way and learn some social skills. my mom says that often i am crass and don't realize it.








i guess i need to learn to be tact, charming, sophisticated, polite, and sociable. i have no idea what i'm doing wrong and what i can do right. all my parents do is ***** about me and how i'm a loser and how no one likes me, but they don't try to help me.





so please.... if you don't really have any advice to give me, please just try to lead me in the right direction. i want friends. i don't want to be home all the time, in my room, listening to my parents tell me how much of a failure i am. there's more to life than that.I'm very socially awkward... people just don't like me, and i don't know how to conduct myself around them. ?
Well first of all I dont know how old you are but here's one thing, just becaus you parents think you're a loser doesnt mean you are. Maybe you just need some time to find your self. It's easier for some people and more difficult for others. If you're not a very social person it may be your parents fault. Did they take you out alot when you were younger, did you go to public schools. If you think you're a loser, your wrong just because you may not be what some one else wants you to be does not make you any less special. You are your self and that should be good enough. Its good enough for God right? So don't let your parents get you down. Shame on them for calling you loser! You can't learn to be charming or sophisticated it just comes natural, in your case it may come a little later just be patient.





Mean while hang out with people that make you feel good, go shop do what you like best and when you are ready you'll blossom like the flower you are.








*Avoid Negative people, they suck.





Good Luck!








-MikeI'm very socially awkward... people just don't like me, and i don't know how to conduct myself around them. ?
tell your parents to go F themselves.
I feel the same. Everyone I know goes away in the end. Er the fact I just quoted NIN might give you an idea why.





Now I'm in my mid 20's I just don't give a 茠uck what people think. I'm not rude or crass (normally) but I just do my own thing. I live in my writing.





It does get very annoying when I actually want to socialize and have no one to do it with. I have quite a few aquatences but no friends.





You don't need to learn tact charm ect. You need to be yourself and find people like you. Don't be something your not. People may like you but that is meaningless if you don't like you.





Your age would come in handy with actuall advice.





If you in school be patient as the ';losers'; in school end up best in life and the popular people normally end up in sales (boo hiss sales and marketing)





I will assume you are not old enough to have a full time job. They are handy when it comes to socializing as they force people together. Social clubs as also good things to join at work.





Any generally any club of something you are interested in is good. Actually I might take my own advice and join a writing club.
You are probably on another level than your peers. Most young people today have no sense of history, culture, politics, etc. If your not into the whole Black culture %26amp; MTV thing then you aren't going to have much in common with young people today. So f***k them! They are ignorant low life's anyway, why would you want to be friends with people like that? Do not conform to societies bull-****. Just be yourself and friends will come.
There are plently of people who struggle with the same problems. Maybe you could try to intercat with people like you. At the same time it being akward you could at least say, ';Hey, this guys no better than me.'; That way you're both on the same level.





Or...you could join a club! Like art? Art Club. Like drama? Drama Club. I think you get my jist.





Don't think so lowly of yourself you're not a loser because you don't have that many friends. Oh yeah, and you might as well forget about your parents. It's probably their fault for not teaching you how to be more social as a child.





good luck ; ]
Perhaps you're too worried about what you will do or say. Being insecure and self-conscious is just plain hard and I really sympathize. But I have found that I do best when I try very hard to get others to talk and limit my speech to encouraging them to tell me about themselves or their experiences. If you become a good listener, you will make good friends.





Everyone blurts out stuff they wish they hadn't said - even the ';coolest'; people. Learn how to laugh it off and move on. The less embarrassment you show, the less anyone will notice you made a gaff.





Just know that the more you turn your attention away from yourself, the more comfortable you'll begin to feel and the more desirable you will become as a friend/companion.


Good luck! You're not a failure, you just need to focus outward!
Your question just jumped pot at me! I hope I can help, as you really need help, and it sounds like you want to change and have a good social life.


From what you say, it sounds like your parents are not helping you much, to use your social skills. They do seem to be critical, but that may not help much.


You are not a loser, or a failure!


To try to improve yourself, go to the library, find some books on being sociable. Read about what being charming is, and learn to be polite, and keep nasty thoughts to yourself , if thats what being crass is. Get some books on interacting with others and teach yourself to be polite. The idea is just to polish up the rough spots, but to be your best self.


You can use this experience you are going thru, as a very positive thing, IF you make a conscious effort to work on each of your negative things.


Learn how to make good conversation with others. You could start by having an interest in something, knowing about it, and talking about that to others. Once people know you a little bit, and they enjoy talking to you, the rest of the conversation will follow easily. Pay attention to what others are saying, because most people love a good listener and someone who lets them speak about themselves.


You can do it! It will take some effort, but give it a shot!


Good luck.


If you really try, maybe in a few months, you could have lots of thigns to do.with people your age, and your life will be alot more interesting and filled with good friends, Most of all, just be yourself.
youn sound like an average teenager so their basically is nothing wrong with you. Dont you have at least 1 good friend you can talk with about your insecurity? Not ALL People have to like you as they are nothing but strangers, you want to be liked by by your friends and family and ofcourse they like and love you.Try to change your negative thoughts into positive as they give you feedback with negativity you can do nothing and so cant nooneelse.If you believe you are worthless so will others so that gives you the power to turn the tables, choose for feeling good about yourself just because you are worth it.Gym,sportclub ,communitycenter are good places to meet new people or get a pt job , dont just wait for things to happen being locked up in your room will give everyone a dreadful feeling its just not the way to go around it if you are honest to oyurself you know that you dint throw your heart in your efforts so go with the saying, THROW YOUR HEART OVER THE BAR THE REST WILL FOLLOW......
we have almost the same situation.


in school and elsewhere,i usually feel alone(though i have friends)..i feel like a loser. i'm so shy and i just can't be myself with everyone! i'm always home as well.





it's so hard feeing like a loser and a failure. i've been feeling like this since i was a kid(i'm in highschool now)...but...





i got tired of it so i did some things that would start molding confidence and trust in myself. it's not easy but it totally worked. it's like a step by step learning. u have to keep on trying and exploring new experiences. LOOK FOR URSELF!





dont think much bout people who seem like they dont like or care bout u. they're just blocking ur way.





ur parents may not understand but remember that u're the only one who can totally understand wut's deep inside you.


search for ur potentials and use those...





do everything that u cud do to ';show that you're a beautiful creation';. do things that would make u proud and apply things u've learned.





';there's more to life than that'; %26lt;-- this is the key





u're NOT a failure





:)
you r not a loser ...everyone has worth .. brush it off ... find yourself go w/ it be real.........
You know you need to learn to socialise. Thats the first step. =]. Now you have to actually learn to socialise. Join some social groups like a sport group or a band. There are also often youth groups in a community. Smile more. Much more. laugh more. Make it seem like you're a person who is really free and you like to laugh and smile.





If you can't fit in with people you already know, perhaps find a stranger to talk to. They don't know about your background so it's easier to talk to them.





Good Luck!!
try to learn new tricks and love yourself and if you move out there don't be the first one to do things, just be calm and wait to see how other pple are doing then you can follow suit. Take a piece of paper and write down all good things you can do to yourself and stick it to your dressing mirror and do them every day and you will be a changed person and free from stress.
I feel the same way.


Can we be friends???
With almost 5 decades of experience dealing with people I found out that you can become fantastic conversationalist by asking other people questions about themselves. By and large we are our own favorite subject. The downside of this is that you have to pay attention to the answers they give and ask related questions. This is how to talk to people. Finding friends is a much more difficult task. The first step is to accept that your friends are not always going to agree with you or act the way you would like them too. It is impossible for me to imagine you have had enough of a shot at life to have failed much of anything. to be a failure you have to have quit trying, I would guess that some tactics you have used may not have been successful but that is a far cry from being a failure. I am guessing from what minute bit of information I have about you that you are seeing things way too much as black and white without noticing that there is some good in almost every outcome. Hope this helps.