Usually a person would just remove themselves from a situation with homosexual or bisexual hating or bashing people. But if you are at school, work, or home, how can you deal with people and situations if you have no choice but to interact with them?
For instance, a gay hating teacher or classmates. Or having a mother who denounces it and family who bashes it?How do you deal with homosexual/bisexual bashing people if you must interact with them on a daily basis?
Everyone deals with it differently. Some are confrontational and will speak up against bigotry to anyone who bashes, and some are scared that they might meet with disapproval if they did that. Which are you?How do you deal with homosexual/bisexual bashing people if you must interact with them on a daily basis?
I wouldnt know about family but at school I just would kiss a guy more if they try to hurt me I know where to kick.
If it was a teacher I wouldn't shut up until I got a written apology, you do have rights you know. And I am speaking from personal experiences here.
As an openly gay man I deal with this everyday. It really does get to you after awhile but you just have to let it go. I personally laugh about it when people get in my face about being gay.
What gives hate speech its power is when people get rilled up and angry. If you choose not to get enraged by it and use hate speech back it eventually neutralizes itself.
I can tell you at my work quite a few people were major bigots. I never let them get to me and joked about being gay. Those people aren't a problem and don't give me **** anymore.
I hate how the kid that are homophobic at me never get called out on it. They never get in trouble for it and I have to stand them everyday. How can I be friends with people like that.
Usually, people like that are pretty wound up. I like to find the one button to press that will make them go INSANE (as in from 0 to Bit** in .05 seconds) and then press it. Then, I casually walk away as they prove to everybody else how depraved they are.
Its loads of fun for everyone.
Sunday, November 21, 2010
Why can't I ever get past small talk when interacting with people?
I find most of the people around my age (being 17) to be somewhat immature, and I can't seem to relate to them at all. I can't stand when I see other guys humping trees, or laughing their asses off at some ';genitalia song';. I have very few ';real'; friends because of it, and I think its because I probably come across as a bit boring to them. I get a long with people fine, but I can never seem to get past small talk for some reason. I know I can offer a lot in a friendship, but it's starting to worry me how I can never really have a real ';conversation'; with someone without being completely uncomfortable or them detecting my fakeness.Why can't I ever get past small talk when interacting with people?
I'm also 17. Same boat as you. I think people my age are immature and think having a good time is through pathetic things like making dirty jokes etc. I think it's pathetic. I'm a bit more mature than that, anyway.
I think it also has to do with being an introvert. I am assuming you, the 17-year-old above me %26amp; me are all introverts. We'd rather communicate with people that understand us and acknowledge who we are on a personal level, than superficially.
I guess we just find it hard to relate to people that are like that. I seem to come off as 'boring' as well, because I don't enjoy interacting with people that are just rude and have a big mouth. LOL. But I have some close friends. I'm alright with 'small talk'. I can handle it. I just talk about the school subject i.e. HSC and I start a good conver. from there.
Also I'm Christian, which makes it harder. I don't go to pathetic Under 18 parties etc. It's so secular. I'd rather find good Christian friends that are socialable and easy to talk to. :)Why can't I ever get past small talk when interacting with people?
Here's a good book for you to check out
Leil Lowndes - How to talk to anyone
u shud maybe just try talking to someone like the person u treally are,who knows maybe the other person might be feeling and doing the same as u.so be urself!
You can start by sharing what you truly feel, and what your interests are. You can e-mail me if you want and start there, tell me what you really feel, what you really like.
I can relate, definitely. I'm 17 as well, and I agree, most people our age are very immature. I have a lot of older friends, and almost no friends my age because I just think they're stupid, frankly (most of them). I'm shy, unfortunately, so I can never seem to get past small talk as well. I get really uncomfortable, like you, and it almost feels like my brain freezes in a conversation because I can't think of something else to say.
I'm also 17. Same boat as you. I think people my age are immature and think having a good time is through pathetic things like making dirty jokes etc. I think it's pathetic. I'm a bit more mature than that, anyway.
I think it also has to do with being an introvert. I am assuming you, the 17-year-old above me %26amp; me are all introverts. We'd rather communicate with people that understand us and acknowledge who we are on a personal level, than superficially.
I guess we just find it hard to relate to people that are like that. I seem to come off as 'boring' as well, because I don't enjoy interacting with people that are just rude and have a big mouth. LOL. But I have some close friends. I'm alright with 'small talk'. I can handle it. I just talk about the school subject i.e. HSC and I start a good conver. from there.
Also I'm Christian, which makes it harder. I don't go to pathetic Under 18 parties etc. It's so secular. I'd rather find good Christian friends that are socialable and easy to talk to. :)Why can't I ever get past small talk when interacting with people?
Here's a good book for you to check out
Leil Lowndes - How to talk to anyone
u shud maybe just try talking to someone like the person u treally are,who knows maybe the other person might be feeling and doing the same as u.so be urself!
You can start by sharing what you truly feel, and what your interests are. You can e-mail me if you want and start there, tell me what you really feel, what you really like.
I can relate, definitely. I'm 17 as well, and I agree, most people our age are very immature. I have a lot of older friends, and almost no friends my age because I just think they're stupid, frankly (most of them). I'm shy, unfortunately, so I can never seem to get past small talk as well. I get really uncomfortable, like you, and it almost feels like my brain freezes in a conversation because I can't think of something else to say.
Why can't I ever get past small talk when interacting with people?
I find most of the people around my age (being 17) to be somewhat immature, and I can't seem to relate to them at all. I can't stand when I see other guys humping trees, or laughing their asses off at some ';genitalia song';. I have very few ';real'; friends because of it, and I think its because I probably come across as a bit boring to them. I get a long with people fine, but I can never seem to get past small talk for some reason. I know I can offer a lot in a friendship, but it's starting to worry me how I can never really have a real ';conversation'; with someone without being completely uncomfortable or them detecting my fakeness.Why can't I ever get past small talk when interacting with people?
.Best to stick to your own principles.Trying to go with the flow would be fake.People whose brains are below their belly button,aren't the best of conversationalists anyway
.Best to stick to your own principles.Trying to go with the flow would be fake.People whose brains are below their belly button,aren't the best of conversationalists anyway
How different is your personality in ';Real life'; towards ';Real people'; as opposed to on here?
and why you think this is?
how much of it has to do with the language and culture of the people you interact with?
and which culture, people do you think have the MOST DIFFICULT time relating and talking ';Being themselves'; with one another and why and how you think this is?
how much of the time do you think the person you are talking to in real life is more ';STYLE'; than actual conversing , communication or SUBSTANCE?..lol
please explain why and how this is true of your area, if wish to explain.
btw, which area of the world you are? (if dont mind sharing)
thanks for your answers!How different is your personality in ';Real life'; towards ';Real people'; as opposed to on here?
...I was hooked at the question itself, then I read the rest and thought, 'wut?'
But I'll give it a bash.
I don't act terribly different on the internet than I do in real life. Of course, there's a lot more ';erm';, ';aah'; and ';like'; in my real life speech! But I tend to speak my mind both via internet and in real life.
In real life, style I suppose conveys the meaning more. I could be saying something like ';I don't think that hat suits you very well.'; Over internet, I sounds rather blunt and impolite, but not malicious and nasty. In real life, facial expression, gesture and all manner of vocal tones, pitches, paces, etc. come into play, to show that, again, I don't mwan what I say in a serious and hurtful way.
tl:dr In real life and over internet I say what I think. I act the same in both places.
how much of it has to do with the language and culture of the people you interact with?
and which culture, people do you think have the MOST DIFFICULT time relating and talking ';Being themselves'; with one another and why and how you think this is?
how much of the time do you think the person you are talking to in real life is more ';STYLE'; than actual conversing , communication or SUBSTANCE?..lol
please explain why and how this is true of your area, if wish to explain.
btw, which area of the world you are? (if dont mind sharing)
thanks for your answers!How different is your personality in ';Real life'; towards ';Real people'; as opposed to on here?
...I was hooked at the question itself, then I read the rest and thought, 'wut?'
But I'll give it a bash.
I don't act terribly different on the internet than I do in real life. Of course, there's a lot more ';erm';, ';aah'; and ';like'; in my real life speech! But I tend to speak my mind both via internet and in real life.
In real life, style I suppose conveys the meaning more. I could be saying something like ';I don't think that hat suits you very well.'; Over internet, I sounds rather blunt and impolite, but not malicious and nasty. In real life, facial expression, gesture and all manner of vocal tones, pitches, paces, etc. come into play, to show that, again, I don't mwan what I say in a serious and hurtful way.
tl:dr In real life and over internet I say what I think. I act the same in both places.
How to stop talking to someone?
I need to stop talking and i can't i am always talking about something. I just wanna stop interacting with people altogether but how can i go about doing that?How to stop talking to someone?
don't call people. dont return calls. keep yourself busy that way you won't get bored and want to call someone. If someone calls you do not answer. and if someone tries to talk to you in person then keep it short. If you see someone near by then walk the other way.How to stop talking to someone?
MY solution: Easy say nothing
My friends solution: Take out your voicebox and nail it to a tree
find someone else to talk to. or listen to music all the time.
i dont always want to talk myself, especially at work, just dont talk and people will lose interested in interacting with you, just dont complain when you need people and theyre not there for you cause you didnt want to interact with them
No need to stop interacting, just practice being a good listener.
try occupying yourself with something i do that and i talk alot it helps you to stop talking or maybe you need to find your own place to be in when you do want to talk or you can put atape over your mouth lol
But how come? You are veryy lucky you can talk. some people have problems talking. we are blessed to have a voice.
Sometimes I know it is hard becsaue it is like you are always running your mouth. but people like it when other people have things to talk about, because then they can include themselves in a conversation. Keep talking. You just might be helping people out.
IF you are not old enough yet, you should consider doing something that involves a lot of talking as a perfession. You would do greatt....
Dont be annoyed with yourself. If you really want to cut it down. speak when something REALLY interests you.
Has someone you respect told you that you talk too much? Have people begun to avoid you because you just chatter on and on? If that's the case, they're probably right.
I don't know that you actually have to quit talking to people. Maybe you need to practice good habits.
Learn to say ';what do you think?'; and really listen to what the other person has to day. Don't spend the whole time they're talking to think of what you're going to say next.
Another good practice is to say ';you must have an opinion about this -- what is it?';
Just a couple things. You can come up with others.advice on high school
don't call people. dont return calls. keep yourself busy that way you won't get bored and want to call someone. If someone calls you do not answer. and if someone tries to talk to you in person then keep it short. If you see someone near by then walk the other way.How to stop talking to someone?
MY solution: Easy say nothing
My friends solution: Take out your voicebox and nail it to a tree
find someone else to talk to. or listen to music all the time.
i dont always want to talk myself, especially at work, just dont talk and people will lose interested in interacting with you, just dont complain when you need people and theyre not there for you cause you didnt want to interact with them
No need to stop interacting, just practice being a good listener.
try occupying yourself with something i do that and i talk alot it helps you to stop talking or maybe you need to find your own place to be in when you do want to talk or you can put atape over your mouth lol
But how come? You are veryy lucky you can talk. some people have problems talking. we are blessed to have a voice.
Sometimes I know it is hard becsaue it is like you are always running your mouth. but people like it when other people have things to talk about, because then they can include themselves in a conversation. Keep talking. You just might be helping people out.
IF you are not old enough yet, you should consider doing something that involves a lot of talking as a perfession. You would do greatt....
Dont be annoyed with yourself. If you really want to cut it down. speak when something REALLY interests you.
Has someone you respect told you that you talk too much? Have people begun to avoid you because you just chatter on and on? If that's the case, they're probably right.
I don't know that you actually have to quit talking to people. Maybe you need to practice good habits.
Learn to say ';what do you think?'; and really listen to what the other person has to day. Don't spend the whole time they're talking to think of what you're going to say next.
Another good practice is to say ';you must have an opinion about this -- what is it?';
Just a couple things. You can come up with others.
How do you handle obnoxious co-workers?
They run around complaining all the time to anyone, acting like everyone here should serve them. Interact with people using blunt comments.
Since this is where I make my money, I do my best to ignore and not make a scene but sometimes it is very hard to do so.
Grrrrrrr....How do you handle obnoxious co-workers?
Yeah, you have the right idea-ignore them. If they come to your desk don't even look up. And pray he isn't the bosses son.How do you handle obnoxious co-workers?
Make sly comments to them that make them feel like idiots.
Do what I do. Get some earplugs and tune them out and listen to some music. Hopefully, your job allows you to do that.
Venting on Q%26amp;A is good for you. At work, do you job well and keep your mouth shut. They will probably get theirs in the end.
I encounter the same thing! Sometimes I have just boldly said: ';Stop Complaining'; and they usually say something like, ';Yeah, I know, I always complain.'; Or, if they are complaining to you, don't comment; just change the subject - they'll get the message sooner than later. We have a secretary in our dept. who complains about everything from not having ice cream socials (can you imagine!) to not being invited to bosses' cocktail happy hours. Frankly, I don't want to go. She complains about her boss emailing her a letter in an email to put into a letter format and print it out! She says ';Why can't he do that!'; It's your job!!! Another approach would be: if you sense they are about to complain, say: ';NO COMPLAINTS, ONLY POSITIVES!'; That should work. Let me know. Thanks.
I ignore them. My iPod is very helpful.
~~~Some Guy, trip them when they walk past you. It's funny.~~~
Since this is where I make my money, I do my best to ignore and not make a scene but sometimes it is very hard to do so.
Grrrrrrr....How do you handle obnoxious co-workers?
Yeah, you have the right idea-ignore them. If they come to your desk don't even look up. And pray he isn't the bosses son.How do you handle obnoxious co-workers?
Make sly comments to them that make them feel like idiots.
Do what I do. Get some earplugs and tune them out and listen to some music. Hopefully, your job allows you to do that.
Venting on Q%26amp;A is good for you. At work, do you job well and keep your mouth shut. They will probably get theirs in the end.
I encounter the same thing! Sometimes I have just boldly said: ';Stop Complaining'; and they usually say something like, ';Yeah, I know, I always complain.'; Or, if they are complaining to you, don't comment; just change the subject - they'll get the message sooner than later. We have a secretary in our dept. who complains about everything from not having ice cream socials (can you imagine!) to not being invited to bosses' cocktail happy hours. Frankly, I don't want to go. She complains about her boss emailing her a letter in an email to put into a letter format and print it out! She says ';Why can't he do that!'; It's your job!!! Another approach would be: if you sense they are about to complain, say: ';NO COMPLAINTS, ONLY POSITIVES!'; That should work. Let me know. Thanks.
I ignore them. My iPod is very helpful.
~~~Some Guy, trip them when they walk past you. It's funny.~~~
Need insight into behavior problems for rescue dog?
I really want to adopt a small chihuahua mix dog from a local rescue, but I'm not sure how much of the dog's behavior can be shaped or altered with patience and training, and how much is the nature of the breed. The dog is very energetic and doesn't show much interest in interacting with people. Not hostile, just indifferent. Dog is one year old and has had no socialization with people. Is it unrealistic for me to hope that the dog might calm down with time and training? I have not adopted the dog yet.Need insight into behavior problems for rescue dog?
You can try to work with this dog, but it will take training, time and patience. There is no way to know how far you can get with it. The dog may be afraid of people so seems indifferent. Scared dogs will often zone out or shut down rather than run away or growl. They seem nicer, but they can be just as scared. Please visit this site to learn how to work with this dog should you decide to get her.
The page on games %26amp; exercises has good tips for how to start off with her.
www.fearfuldogs.comNeed insight into behavior problems for rescue dog?
No. I rescued a Siberian Husky, at the age of 1.5. She had been beaten, and lived in a crate all her life. She didn't wag her tail, give kisses, or even know her name when I bought her from the guy, it took me a year to teach her how to give her paw. (Giving the paw is a trust symbol.) It is going to take a lot of time, and the dog may never be normal again, but what you can do is try to make sure the dog has a good life. Your best bet would be to enroll in some obedience classes if you do decide to adopt. But not for the first few weeks, just focus on praise, give the dog a treat just for looking at you in the eyes, teach the come command first by just holding out a piece of food, backing up and saying ';come'; Then work on sit, don't teach the down until the dog has become comfortable with you, because downing a dog is a submissive position.
We have 2 Chihuahuas and they r great... a 1 yr old is still a puppy and will not out grow that until they are about 3ish when they are more full grown. Between 6 months and 1 yr is a good time to start a more formal training. Pet-Smart has a really good training class' for all ages.. The dog maybe distant until they get use to you and the surroundings and they determine what their territory is.. being a dog from a shelter they may have been abused or at least hit for something and are afraid yet til they get to know you and trust you...you just need to love them and re insure them they are wanted and they belong. Speak nicely but firm and always reward them for good acts and treat them with an extra goody for love... Good luck
You can try to work with this dog, but it will take training, time and patience. There is no way to know how far you can get with it. The dog may be afraid of people so seems indifferent. Scared dogs will often zone out or shut down rather than run away or growl. They seem nicer, but they can be just as scared. Please visit this site to learn how to work with this dog should you decide to get her.
The page on games %26amp; exercises has good tips for how to start off with her.
www.fearfuldogs.comNeed insight into behavior problems for rescue dog?
No. I rescued a Siberian Husky, at the age of 1.5. She had been beaten, and lived in a crate all her life. She didn't wag her tail, give kisses, or even know her name when I bought her from the guy, it took me a year to teach her how to give her paw. (Giving the paw is a trust symbol.) It is going to take a lot of time, and the dog may never be normal again, but what you can do is try to make sure the dog has a good life. Your best bet would be to enroll in some obedience classes if you do decide to adopt. But not for the first few weeks, just focus on praise, give the dog a treat just for looking at you in the eyes, teach the come command first by just holding out a piece of food, backing up and saying ';come'; Then work on sit, don't teach the down until the dog has become comfortable with you, because downing a dog is a submissive position.
We have 2 Chihuahuas and they r great... a 1 yr old is still a puppy and will not out grow that until they are about 3ish when they are more full grown. Between 6 months and 1 yr is a good time to start a more formal training. Pet-Smart has a really good training class' for all ages.. The dog maybe distant until they get use to you and the surroundings and they determine what their territory is.. being a dog from a shelter they may have been abused or at least hit for something and are afraid yet til they get to know you and trust you...you just need to love them and re insure them they are wanted and they belong. Speak nicely but firm and always reward them for good acts and treat them with an extra goody for love... Good luck
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